Dear Mr., Miss, or Mrs. Noticer,

Gee. I haven’t talked with you in a while. I wonder how you are. 

But…how am I supposed to communicate with you? It seems I must be adaptable if I actually desire a response.
Well, if you are my good friend and we have been through lots together (this means we are relatively the same age), I will email you, of course. And I will hear back from you soon.
But if you are the age of my offspring, my email may well wither on the vine. For you, I better text. Aha, there’s my answer right away!
And then there is the Facebook crowd. For them I must message. 
OMG. I also must tweet to preserve my coolness quotient and post on LinkedIn for my professional creds. 
However….I don’t care how uncool I am; I am drawing a red line in the sand. If you want me to Instagram, fuhgeddaboudit! It’s hard enough to figure out whom I should email, whom I should text, and whom I must message. (Of course, my use of the m after who certainly gives away my age and uncoolness.) And now you want me to Instagram?! Nononononono!
Pinterest? No way in Hades. Plain and simple.
Google+, Tumblr, VK, Flickr, Vine?! Hahahahaha. You will never find me. I am hiding way under my bed covered with a quilt.
But now. But now. But now, I am being told that nobody will become a Noticer unless I use Periscope.  Aiyaiyaiyai!!!!!
This social media stuff has turned me into a cranky, petulant two-year-old. Why must I be the one to adapt to your preferred communication style?! Why must I figure out how old you are, or how tech saavy you are, or how artsy you are so that I know where to find you?!
What was wrong with the olden days when you communicated by calling someone on a big black telephone by dialing the letters and numbers. That worked fine! Today of course you can call someone on their cell, but don’t leave a message for anyone under 40 because they will not listen to a voicemail. It is against their religion.
So here is my formal announcement: If you want to communicate with me, kindly purchase a quill and parchment, write me a nice letter in cursive, put it in an envelope and seal it with wax, and then find a horseback rider who will deliver it to me on a silver tray.
Ah! Them were the days.
Oh but wait….this beautiful invitation on parchment just arrived and it is for a dinner that occurred two weeks ago. Darn! Why do I always miss out?!
Ok ok OK! Soon you will find me on Periscope.

Meanwhile, please click here.

©2016 Margery Leveen Sher


The Noticer’s Guide to Living and Laughing…..Change Your Life Without Changing Your Routine is now available on Amazon, Nook, and iTunes.  Read the reviews and purchase here
MARGERY IS AVAILABLE TO KEYNOTE YOUR MEETING OR CONFERENCE with a motivational talk filled with both startling wisdom and humongous laughs: 

“Notice What You See and Be a Hero at Work”